My mum has always tried to coax out a promise from me, ever since I remember- be a good sister,study and top every exam possible, help around the house more, be more like my cousins, eat healthy, stop drinking coke, sleep a bit… I get ahead of myself; and I’ve always half heartedly nodded along, because like mothers do, she wouldn’t stop nagging me about it till I promised.

But the very first time I made a heartfelt promise, I really knew I’d keep it. I wanted it to be true. I wanted to be the person who my promise said I would be. It was made over a text message to someone I loved, and it was a promise of ingenuity, with a tad bit of unhealthy intensity. Needless to say, I broke it about two months later.

Now before you judge me, beloved readers, I have to tell you that I maintain I have changed- priorities, interests, person, and all. You may argue that people don’t really change, which probably is true, but they open up a little bit more- to the world, to themselves, to others. Their worldviews become a slight bit realigned, and that’s exactly what happened to me. Call it an epiphany, if you will, but I stopped living in the past, somewhat like Hugh Grant in Music And Lyrics.

That promise, at the time of making was something I’d wanted to make since I was 8, and finally I found myself living that daydream. And I think that’s what promises are- your dreams conveyed to another person. And once you realize you don’t desperately need to fulfil that dream, you break them (unless you think of honour and all those shitty things).

Recently, a couple of my friends asked me about the five people I’d keep in touch with five years down the line. To be honest, I’m not sure. I mean, I really like the people I hang out with on a regular basis, and I can’t imagine life without them- considering the fact that they keep me in check when I go nuts with work and save me from burning myself out. And I have fun with them with their quirks and their stupid decisions and their endurance. But then I think of the people I thought the same about 5 years earlier and I realize how many I haven’t talked to in years now. And I know I disliked half my friends 5 years back. And while I’d love nothing less than being as close to them as I am now, I know that we will change- we’ll prioritize, and we’ll have fluctuating egos, and we’ll have schedules which will clash, and some may have SOs, and we’ll move on with more promises of emails, and texts, and WhatsApp messages. And we’ll move on as we dream of better prospects and people who belive in and are willing to sacrifice for our personal causes. And more promises will be made and broken.

Twitter: @WallflowerBlack


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